the faithful ramblings a late bloomer. . .

the faithful musings of a four letter word user on a quest for authenticity.

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

A case of the Mondays

I had a plan of how it was supposed to go.  Like we all, often do.

However, a slight little change in plans set me completely off course.  I didn't even take the much needed shower.  While it was a completely welcomed surprise that set me off course, by the end of the day, i felt as thought I would never get back my momentum.  I learned a lesson though, which is I guess what really matters; the lesson being to NEVER set about my getting my chores done before getting down and dirty with God in a little QT and before I get my writing goals met, on a Monday.

It started out like any other Monday.  Well, any other Monday for me, is not like any other Monday for you.  I LOVE Monday.  I LIVE FOR Monday. I look forward to Monday, like you look forward to Friday.  Monday is all about ME day.  And, all about Jesus day.  All about me and Jesus day.  Ah.

The past few months, since this writing journey began, Mondays have really become the one day when I can sit in the still and focus on where God is telling me to go with this thing.  I can shut everything else out (except how much I love Mondays) and listen to what he's telling me to write and get down to the business of doing it.

Last week, half of my parents were in town and I had several meetings and other obligations, so I knew my Monday was shot, but went with it, feeling like I was sacrificing my Monday for the greater good.  While I did, very much miss it, I kept thinking, "it's ok.  Next Monday is just around the corner'.

It doesn't rain much in Florida.  Not like it does in other parts of the world, where the rain just sets in for the day or days on end.  We get plenty of showers, but not so many rainy days.  When I realized that yesterday was forecasted to be a really rainy day,  I decided I better alter my preferred Monday schedule a bit, running the errands first thing before the rain set in, rather than spending the morning with God and writing.  I figured I would knock out the my errands and my chores before lunch an as soon as lunch was over, I would be able to cozy on the couch and get down to business, and thereby making the most out of my rainy day.

While something horrible could have happened to derail my plans, it was a truly unexpected and pleasant surprise that set me off course.  Jeff came home from work after lunch with no plan of returning to the office for the afternoon!  Now, please don't get me wrong (especially, you babe!), I was THRILLED to have the afternoon with him!  We've been running a thousand miles an hour the last week, many times in opposite directions, and I was over the moon that he'd busted his ass that morning at work so we could have the afternoon together.  Truly, it was a great treat!

By supper time, I was in a funk.  I had worked all day, doing chores, running errands and cooking but hadn't gotten to the "work" I so desperately needed and wanted to do.  I had completely lost another Monday.  Two weeks in a row.  I needed some Jesus, I needed to write, I needed not to fail at completing my goals. 

Here's your sign, Linds.  Satan, you mother f*cker, stealer of all joy and peace, thanks for taking away a perfectly wonderful surprise and using it to jump start my week with an extra jolt of exhaustion and a pervasive sense of failure.

At this point, you're probably thinking, "why am I reading this?"  Hell, I'm certainly sitting here thinking, "why am I writing this?"  The point is (hallelujah, we've made it to the bottom line), is that while I sit here exhausted, terrified of the busy week that spans before me like a Jordan crossing to get to next Monday, I KNOW that God will use this shitty little experience.  I know that he will take my heavy eyelids and pry them open and help me get it all done.  Who knows what he's going to do in me and through me this week, but I know it's going to be good.

I know he'll pull me out of the funk, see to it that I get some rest, make a few moments, like these, for me to get some writing done, and that by Him, through Him and with Him, I can get it all done and live to see another Monday.

Update:  It's now 8:25 p.m. and I made it through the day, which 13 hours before, I wondered how I would ever survive.    While it wasn't easy, God granted me peace and courage to keep busy and keep on task and I'm so grateful.  

I had a work event tonight, which are never really any fun, but tonight while speaking to a group I felt God infusing me with his patience to complete my duties to the best of my ability. To God be the glory, great things he hath done. 

5 comments:

  1. same thing happened to me on Saturday. funny how "later today" often turns into "not today". hopefully we'll learn from our mistakes.

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  2. thanks bryan, always nice to know we're not the only ones who deal with our own humanity!

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  3. Just a reminder that God influences us on His terms and not when we feel it should be convenient to us. Glad you got your time with Him, Lindsay.

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  4. great post lindsay. i find that i waste so much time on stupid things (like checking FB in the morning) that i miss out on my Jesus-time. i'm praying for more discipline.

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  5. Gil - thanks for that reminder that God often laughs at our plans! I wish I would have remembered that on Monday!

    Jon- thank you for the comment! I, too, am going to add discoline to my prayer list!

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